ASK THE PSYCHOLOGIST ISSUE 63: Can a Person Who Constantly Hates Something or Someone Develop Physical and Mental Health Problems, Which Can Shorten Their Life?
CAN A PERSON WHO CONSTANTLY HATES SOMETHING OR SOMEONE DEVELOP PHYSICAL AND MENTAL HEALTH PROBLEMS, WHICH CAN SHORTEN THEIR LIFE ?
In other words — HATE CAN BE HAZADEROUS TO YOUR HEALTH !
Years ago, I had an intern that thought he was more effective, when counseling a person, to become very intense, showing extreme emotion, with his face becoming red and his overall affect on the verge of anger. If I took his blood pressure and pulse rate at the time, I’m sure they would have been elevated. I had to explain to him that if he could not control his emotions, he could wind up having physical problems in the years ahead. I talked to him about how the human body goes into a flight or flight mode when it senses danger. Since there was no danger present when simply counseling a person, he artificially created this physiology needlessly. I suggested that if he could not choose to control this form of anger, he should consider another profession or learn another style of counseling. If an outside person looked through a two-way mirror and didn’t know what was actually happening , they would get the impression that this counselor may have hated the person they were talking with.
The dictionary defines HATE as feeling an intense or passionate dislike for someone or something.It’s not unexpected that the definition of ANGER is synonymous with hate being: a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility. So, it would not be unexpected to find the definition of HOSTILE BEHAVIOR as being unfriendliness or opposition to a person, thing or belief. Therefore, one can see that behaviors that involves hate, anger and hostility, which are associated to human fight or flight, when there is no immediate threat to your life, can be, “Dangerous to Your Health”.
Dr William Glasser, the founder of Reality Therapy and Choice Theory Psychology, often spoke about the New Brain (Cerebral Cortex) and the Old Brain (Reptilian Brain). The new brain in human beings has been developing for thousands of years, but the old brain preceded the new brain, and its primary function was survival of the species. The old brain doesn’t have the capacity to think and since its original purpose was survival, that is where the instincts for fight or flight originates.
When a person experiences hate, the brain activates a distinct “hate circuit“—primarily involving the insula, putamen, and frontal cortex—responsible for processing disgust, predicting actions, and prepping for aggression. This state involves dehumanization and reduced empathy. When hate leads to aggression either physically or verbally, and a person becomes angry, the brain triggers the “fight-or-flight” response, where the amygdala (emotional center) goes into hyperdrive, identifying threats or perceived threats, while activity in the prefrontal cortex (rational, thinking part) decreases. This causes the old brain to create a surge of adrenaline, cortisol, and noradrenaline, increasing heart rate, elevating blood pressure, thickening blood and shifting focus to the perceived threat, often impairing logical judgment.
The old brain now is preparing for an attack from an imagined saber tooth tiger, not just for someone that has a different perception of the world. The old brains response is the blood thickening, clotting in the event the person gets cut in the fight for survival. The heart rate increases to get blood to the extremities so the person could fight off the wild animal, the palm of the hands and balls of the feet secrete sticky perspiration so the person can hold a club and get traction to run away, all in an attempt to survive an attack. Now you must ask the question, when a disagreement with a person turns into an argument and the persons physiology mimics the above actions, is it good or bad for your overall health? The answer to this question is a resounding NO, unless the person has a psychological impairment called Cognitive Dissonance.
Cognitive Dissonance results in mental tension and discomfort by activating the brain’s conflict-monitoring and emotional-regulation centers. The anterior cingulate cortex (ACC) detects the conflict between opposing beliefs or behaviors, while the insula and amygdala generate feelings of anxiety, guilt, or irritation, driving the need to rationalize or change behavior to restore consistency. For many people with this problem, they would rather run away from the other persons different perception, than to stay and disagree (Not Argue) and compromise. If not willing to address another’s perceptions in a civil disagreement, then there is always the risk of loosing relationships.
What I have been telling people for decades is that all human beings have their own unique brain (Like Fingerprints), with no two people having the same brain and experiences. Therefore, no two people can see something 100% the same way. As a result, every conversation with another is a disagreement to varying degrees. Once a person accepts this fact, then they realize getting along with another requires a degree of comprise and negation. Arguing is when a person moves from disagreeing, stating they are right, and the other person is wrong. As Glasser stated, one of the innate higher psychological needs in all human beings is freedom to perceive (Unless there is brain damage or brain washing). If you attempt to take away a person’s freedom to perceive, by telling them they are wrong and you are right, then a human response is to fight to keep their freedom to perceive. This is why all politicians should be versed in how to disagree by compromising and negotiating. Only when ones being is being directly threated by physical harm, more self-preservation defensive behavior may be required (It’s hard to compromise with a person holding a gun to your head, but there are rare stories of people who actually did this.)
I mentioned brain washing techniques above, because if one is subject to being conditioned, repeatedly, with false information, then they loose sight of what is right and wrong. Josh Billings once stated that “Common Sense Is Instinct, and Enough of It Is Genius” . In the book, The New Art of War: China’s Deep Strategy Inside the United States, by William J. Holstein (published in 2019), examines how China uses non-military means to influence and infiltrate the U.S. One of their main tools is brainwashing their own people and paying their agents to do the same to other countries. Their goal is to implant diverse information into a society, which can create hate, anger and hostility in the countries they are attacking. As mentioned above, these behaviors interfere with a person’s ability to think clearly and loose the ability to have common sense reasoning. People in general, don’t realize that we have been at war with Communist China since the 50’s, starting with the Korean conflict. Since then, they have changed their tactics in attacking the US.
I recommend everyone read Holstein’s book, since it will give you an awareness of how Communist China is attacking the US at present.
Key themes and insights from Holstein’s book include:
· Non-Kinetic Warfare: The book focuses on how China operates below the threshold of traditional military conflict, utilizing a “deep strategy” to weaken the United States from within.
· Targeting Core Sectors: Holstein highlights how Chinese entities, often with state support, target U.S. academic, technological, and political institutions.
· Infiltration Efforts: The work analyzes how China attempts to gather data, influence U.S. policies, and gain technological secrets to boost its own rise.
· Targeted Audience: It is a critical analysis designed for readers interested in international relations, cybersecurity, and Sino-American relations.
One of the insights I developed after reading this book is how China, daily, is affecting the general media, from social media to broadcast news (My text, The New Expanded Edition of HOW THE MEDIA CREATES VICTIMS). Also, how the Communist Chinese Party (CCP) funds demonstrations and riots in the US. Recently it was exposed how an individual American, living in China, funded demonstrations and riots to divide the country. This is just one instance.
Currently, the “Ways and Means Committee Chairman Jason Smith (MO-08) is demanding records from The People’s Forum, a New York-based 501(c)(3) organization, in a letter today following mounting evidence that shows that this organization has acted as a foreign agent of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and has received millions of dollars in funding from a known CCP ally, Neville Roy Singham, while enjoying the benefits of U.S. tax-exempt status. The letter comes amid an ongoing and comprehensive investigation by the Ways and Means Committee to ensure the U.S. tax-exempt sector is not abusing the lucrative federal benefits they currently enjoy or undermining U.S. national interests.
Chairman Smith’s letter details how The People’s Forum has:
- Justified Hamas’ October 7th terrorist attacks against Israel, including within hours of the massacre that killed over 1,200 innocent civilians.
- Incited protests and riots across the U.S., including violent demonstrations against Immigration and Customs Enforcement and disruptive occupations of college campuses across the U.S.
- Admitted to receiving over $20 million in funding from Neville Roy Singham, a wealthy U.S. expatriate living in Shanghai with long-documented CCP ties, which was funneled through shell companies and donor-advised funds.
- Hosted events and courses pushing CCP propaganda, glorifying the Chinese revolution and partnering with pro-PRC groups”.
When I became aware of the divisive methods the CCP uses, that creates division within the United States, I asked myself, what political party would be most venerable to China’s brainwashing attacks. That party would have to demonstrate extreme liberalism, to the extent of supporting Socialism, leading to Communism.
How are hateful and evil media, people and political parties, identified so they can be avoided?
Signs of a hateful, evil or highly toxic person, media, or political organization, include deliberate manipulation, chronic lying, a complete lack of empathy, and taking pleasure in the pain of others. They are often controlling, selfish, and refuse to take responsibility for their actions, frequently shifting blame to others while destroying relationships.
Key warning signs and traits to look for include:
- Deliberate Cruelty and Manipulation: They enjoy causing harm, pain, or discomfort to others, often through gaslighting, lying, or controlling behavior.
- Lack of Empathy and Remorse: They are incapable of sharing in others’ feelings, never feel sorry for the pain they cause, and are unconcerned with morality.
- Extreme Control and Entitlement: They seek to dominate relationships and environments, often isolating victims from support systems and demanding things go their way.
- Pathological Lying and Deception: They warp reality, distort facts, and use charming facades to hide their true, destructive nature.
- Blame-Shifting: They never accept responsibility for their actions and will manipulate situations to make victims feel guilty.
- Destructive Tendencies: They often seek to disrupt or destroy what others find meaningful. They may initially appear charming but are often driven by selfish motives, power, and greed
Stop and think if you know people, media outlets or politicians that are described above.
Bart P. Billings, Ph.D.
COL SCNG-SC, Military Medical Directorate (Ret.)
Functioned as: Licensed Clinical Psychologist CA PSY 7656
Licensed Marriage, Family Therapist CA LMFT 4888
-Director/Founder International Military & Civilian Combat Stress Conference
-Initial Enlisted Ranks and Retired as Medical Service Corps Officer with a total of 34 years in US Army
-Recipient of the 2014 Human Rights Award from Citizens Commission on Human Rights International & The University Of Scranton “Frank O’Hara Award” in 2016.
bartbillings@yahoo.com
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